The light has returned...

The light has returned and it’s bursting out of my drained body like the sun bursting through a forest filled with dark trees, letting the light bleed through it. I feel happy and care-free and at peace. I want this feeling of giddy joy to last forever but on earth, impossible feelings like these don’t last... Happiness is not a constant state.
But a smile lingers at the corners of my mouth, my heart, thirsty for love – yet an abundance of happiness, joy, pleasure, delight and glee escape my lips. I only see puffy clouds and vibrant flowers… Many tiny butterflies are tickling my insides with the light, playful flutter of their wings. I giggle inside and my eyes are aglow. This feeling is extra special because I made it myself – I didn’t rely on anything or... anyone else to wake it up inside of me. It came out of me – out of my mind. I believed it into existence. I focussed on it being real. And no one can take it away from me. I used to look for happiness outside of myself. But realise that it can only be found inside. Everything else is an additional benefit. With this wondrous, glorious feeling comes a wave of self-confidence. I bask in it and nourish it. It might not last long but at least I know this kind of happiness is built on something solid, something inside of me and not another person. I can only be honest with myself and believe in myself to make my dreams come true. For I am the only person I can trust…

Untitled

Your breath gets caught in your throat. Your heart beats faster but your body gets cold. And then your cheeks turn red and warm. A dull pain forms in the centre of your chest and like a stain forming on a carpet - it spreads out to the rest of your body and by the time it hits your brain, it's too late because a tear has already spilled over onto your cheek and is making its way down your face, leaving a trail of bruises.
Time has stopped, no sound, no visuals, no thoughts. Just a heavy feeling of pain, despair, regret, betrayal all mixed in one.
I guess its better than feeling nothing, however brief the moment was for you, pain means life. It’s part of the experience. But what you do with it, is up to you.