Things That Make Me Feel Good

Long conversations with people I care about. We dont have to agree but we respect each other's opinions. When my friends come to visit or I go visit them and we watch dvds, eat pizza, popcorn and laugh together until my stomach hurts.
Listening to the rain in the middle of the night and curling into a ball, knowing I'm warm and safe and tomorrow is Saturday or Sunday.
Dressing up in my sexy high heels and putting on my make-up - excitement bubbling in my tummy - loving the thought of painting the town red.
Being with my family and knowing I belong.
Friday afternoon, leaving work to start my weekend.
Playing with a puppy or a kitten.
Preparing a meal for my family or my friends.
Reaching my goals.
The sun waking me up with birds chirping and feeling rested after a good night's sleep.
Realizing how lucky I am.
Being an independent woman.
Crying because I'm happy or after watching a soppy movie that touched me.
Clean sheets and towels out of the tumble dryer.
When I find money in my pocket that I forgot about.
When someone tells me they miss me or loves me or that they appreciate me unexpectedly.
New shoes.
New clothes.
New hairstyle.
When I realize how strong I really am.
When I help someone.
When someone helps me.
A box of chocolates.
Smelling the ocean on a hot Summer's night.
Falling in love.
Being true to myself.
A hot shower after a long day.
Being home and feeling safe.
Laughing at myself.
Hot chocolate on a very cold day.
Good memories and bumping into good old friends.
Making people laugh or smile.
Being creative and getting an outlet for it.
Learning everyday - building my knowledge.
Feeling satisfied and grateful.
Being able to pay off my debt.
Eating out and good company.
Being productive and solving the problem.
Praying.
Breathing.
Living.
Loving.

Wise Words

I can't remember where I read/got this, but whenever I page through my old diary, that I used to keep through my varsity years, I realize how wise and true this simple message really is. I wish to share it with everyone...




UNDERSTAND THAT HAPPINESS IS NOT A CONSTANT STATE!
If you have moments of happiness, savour them. You have to feel sadness to enjoy those times when everything seems right. Being content is all about accepting this.
Take pleasure in the small things - sunshine on your skin, contagious laughter, a dramatic thunderstorm, energetic music... they ease the soul.

I Keep Hoping

Sometimes I feel so weak. Burdened with responsibilities and doing the right thing, being an example to my peers and maintaining my lifestyle and the image I am portraying to the world. And then there are those times when I just want to let go. When I just want to forget about all the heavy burdens and pain life has dealt me and when I just want to fly far away. And then I let myself go, I let myself soar, I forget about the restrictions of everyday life and enjoy the freedom I get to taste - if only for a little while.

But these moments have consequences and a rather expensive price to pay sometimes. You get punished for your need to be free. You get punished for stepping out of your box. By people, by institutions, by the law, by yourself.

Once upon a time, I believed that I would never apologise for being happy and making myself happy but somehow, somewhere things have changed and I find myself apologising all the time! And suddenly I can't trust anyone. The more people I surround myself with, the more unsure I become of their motives and my path. It corrupts me on the inside - not being able to trust anyone. It makes me paranoid and it disrupts my focus because I can't be happy with someone whom I don't trust.

All I'm hoping for is that I'll be able to find a path towards my happiness, towards sanity, towards freedom. Without feeling guilty (which is also a price one pays) and without being punished for going after what I need and what I crave and what I think I deserve.